numb3r_5ev3n

When I got started sewing, other than repairing toys and sewing buttons back on (something I learned to do fairly early) it was to make costumes.

My first attempts were rather crude, like using a blanket stitch (the second stitch I ever learned after a running stitch) to sew a hemline. We did not have a sewing machine. My grandparents had a Singer model from the 1920s that I was allowed to use only once, to make the dress for the doll that I made for my baby cousin.

I still made attempts. After seeing Sarah's dress from the ballgown scene in Labyrinth, I stared at the prom gown patterns at the local craft store, and imagined being able to make something like it.

I attempted Real Sewing in Home Economics class when I was 13. It was a boardshorts pattern. The pattern was too complicated for a bunch of 7th graders (one student infamously somehow "accidentally" made his into "Hammer pants" by accident, and wore them.) It was exactly the wrong kind of pattern to get a bunch of tweens interested in sewing. And I bought exactly the wrong type of fabric (gauzy shirt-weight in a Hawaiian print.) It ended up not being finished.

Then, when I was 15, I went to my first Renaissance Festival: Scarborough Faire. I was agog and rather envious at all of the costumes I saw. I immediately went home, acquired the worst black acetate fabric I could find (we had it on hand for another project for Theatre Camp that it never got used for) and made a tabard with a rampant deer on it in blue knit fabric (using fusible interfacing) and hood and mantle of the same blue knit fabric. I hand stitched all of it, and not very well. I was too impatient (ADHD) at that time to be very good at hand sewing. But I wore it the next time we went to Scarborough.

Then, when I was 16, I ended up in the Teen Otherkin Coven I've written about in other posts as a Junior in High School, and (soon to be ex) Best Friend's mom had a table sewing machine. And it was off to the races.

We spent weekends hammering out our variations on the so-called "SCA Special." And we wore our finished products to school on Fridays. Picture two 16-year old gothlings passing each other in the hallway at your typical high school, all decked out in their renfaire best, bellowing "JOHN SMALLBERRIES!" like it was a password, because we were in the habit of leaving The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai: Across The Eighth Dimension on as background noise while we worked.

I finally pulled my attempted boardshorts back out and finished them. But they were still the wrong fabric, and it pilled up immediately in the crotch the moment I tried to wear them. But then I used the the pattern to make a pair out of chambray, that I wore for years.

I got a job at the craft store, which I promptly lost because I was an untreated ADHD nitwit who couldn't stay on task. After a year of making a lot of my own clothes, I kind of lost interest as my mental health spiralled. The hobby became something I would take back out every so often as my mental health improved, or I would get flashes of inspiration or the sudden realization of how to fix a project that had stalled. I got really good at reverse-engineering things I saw in films (like Anakin's outfit in Revenge Of The Sith.)

Fast forward to last year. A lot of my garb, like the gray cloak I made when I was 16, ended up in a storage unit that eventually flooded. I'm slowly replacing it, bit by bit. I want to start making some more regular daywear as well. It's just an expensive hobby to get into the way things are now.

EDIT: But there was a point to this when I originally posted it, and the ADHD happened and I forgot. And it was this: When I dived into sewing as a hobby for real when I was 16, it was when I had weekly access to a really awesome machine. And working on a recent project caused me to realize that this, more than anything, probably encouraged me to dive in and just see what I could make. It didn't have a lot of the problems that cheaper machines had, and could do more functions. I didn't have the worry that I would develop later, that something might go south while I was working on a project and it would be botched or ruined.

I've used a series of machines over the years, each with their own issues. And one thing I've realized is: the boomer-aged people I knew in the 80s had the cash to drop on really good machines. and that can make a big difference. But more than anything, I need to get over my trepidation and just dive back in.

I watched some Youtube Videos and learned out to wrap crystals!

( Incoming Images! )

There's a popular Kate Bush song from Back In The Day making its rounds again, but it's not the one that's stuck in my head. that's this one (current mood):

It appears as if Elon Musk has acquired Twitter, which means I am going to be reducing my activity on that site by at least 75%. Which I have been trying and failing to do so far over the past year. (ETA: LOL PSYCH. I'm glad the deal fell through. ETA 2: Damn it.)

One of the reasons I haven't been back here as much in the past few months is that I have been alternately Doomscrolling the Ukraine situation and interacting with the Hannibal/HEU (Hannibal Extended Universe) fandom - the majority of which exists on Twitter.

Oh man. How do I even explain the Hannibal Extended Universe?

So Mads Mikkelsen and Hugh Dancy, the costars of Hannibal, have been in a ton of other films and shows. Sometimes (more often than not) the Fannibals will decide that those films and shows and the characters that Mads Mikkelsen and Hugh Dancy have portrayed within them are adjacent to the Hannibal continuity. Fanfics will frequently feature crossovers between the Hannibal TV show and other media which is considered to be in the HEU. There is an HEU shipping chart. And over the past two weeks, SpaceDogs in particular has eaten my brain.

What is SpaceDogs? I'm glad you asked!

This is Adam.

Adam is a Pure Cinnamon Roll on the Autistic Spectrum (specifically diagnosed with Aspergers) from the eponymous 2009 film Adam, which is like a slice of life portrayal of a neurodivergent man in his late twenties trying to navigate the allistic/neurotypical-centric world around him. His primary interests are astronomy, technology, and watching raccoons frolic in the park. As such, he is the "Space" half of SpaceDogs.

This is Nigel.

He is a violent gangster/cocaine runner who primarily operated out of Bucharest, Romania, until certain events depicted in the 2013 film Charlie Countryman. His primary interests are Doing Crimes, stalking his ex wife, and trying to kill Shia LaBeouf's character (the eponymous Charlie.) He is the Dogs half of SpaceDogs, because of his trademark Wiener Dog-patterned bowling shirt.

For some reason, Fannibals ship these two like burning. And now I do too. I'm still trying to figure that one out. (I think the Violent Gangster/Pure Cinnamon Roll ship is a popular manga trope? Is it? Do I have that right?) I think it appeals to me because, while I love the Hannibal and Will, I just can't get past the more toxic aspects of it or the fact that Hannibal gaslit THE HELL out of Will and murdered people close to him. While the idea of Violent Gangster finally moving the fuck on from his ex wife Gabi (who is also a really hecking cool character, Evan Rachel Wood's performance was over 9000 in that movie.) and shacking up with The Astronomer he didn't know he needed in his life is a lot more palatable.

This has turned out to be quite the fandom rabbit hole.

And when I realize it has been a few weeks since I've posted, I shame spiral about it and them doomscroll/fanscroll some more to avoid shamespiraling. But I could bypass the whole shamespiraling process if I could just nope out of that hellsite for good.

So maybe now is the time.

Anyway, here are the ghillie shoes I was making!


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