numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
First and foremost: https://neocities.org

1. "Ok but like. What the fuck is there to do on the internet anymore?" Tumblr post with Old Web resources.

2. The Small Web

3. Resources List for the Personal Web, from the The 32-bit Cafe. (Thanks, [personal profile] finch!)

4. Website Background Archives. Most of the ones I remember from back in the day are there.

5. Free Code Camp! Learn to code your own website!
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
Reference: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZpqpeDNb2c

1. I have never felt so called out, and it would be hilarious if this video's script/narration turns out to be AI (there is a cadence to it, a certain way that certain words are mispronounced, that I feel like I'm beginning to spot or clock, if that makes sense.) 2. Regardless, this video is 100% spot on. 3. I too have felt empty and hollow because I was not a person, I was a golem made of media hyperfocuses and references, and this was something that acquaintances were already calling me out on in my teens. 4. This meshes with thoughts I have had about the Tron franchise recently. But Tron was not created by an elite group or focus group, it was created by an artist, co-opted by Disney, and it has succeeded culturally with people despite Disney's failed attempts to market it. It is, as Damien Walter might say, "The Matrix film that The Matrix did not want them to make. (Even if he might not agree with me in this instance.) But why is this?

The feeling I had last night is one that someone on Reddit expressed months ago: it's like there is another, deeper movie in Tron Ares that is trying to find its way out, or the cut we got was cut down from a longer version that was meant to be way deeper and maybe more surreal/psychedelic/mindblowing. Like how both Beyond The Black Rainbow and Mandy, both by director Panos Cosmatos, felt super-deep and symbolic, despite their simple stories and narrative structures (A girl escapes an institution where she has been imprisoned; a man avenges his fridged partner in a roaring rampage of revenge.) But what gave me this feeling last night was not just the movie itself, but the soundtrack by Nine Inch Nails. So many people have attributed the success of Tron Ares as an artwork (in the areas where it does succeed) to this soundtrack, saying things like "it does a lot of the heavy lifting," etc.

And I think the answer, or common denominator, is how capitalism corrupts and subsumes Art. Art is meant to express the human condition and propagate cultural symbols. Capitalism cheapens it. Capitalism hijacks and commodifies it, and turns it into something designed to make us want or need to participate further in capitalism. Before capitalism, people were shaped by cultural symbols, and this is just how things were. And if you didn't assimilate, you could just leave and survive outside of that structure. And I think this is what everyone who dreams of "Burning it all down" wants to return to. It was capitalism that turned Art and People into something that could be commodified, because capitalism demands assimilation and participation. Capitalism makes participation mandatory.

Disney tries to bury Tron because it does not give them a return for their investment of capital. The symbols spread, but it doesn't translate into dollar signs for them. It's like a pirate signal, in a sense. It's subversive in a way that Disney never meant it to be. (I mean, the first film is a Hacker Polycule thwarting the CEO of a Fortune 500 company.) Tron is massively influential as a cultural symbol, but somehow those symbols are able to permeate culture and spread, regardless of how well or poorly its installments do at the box office. It's one of those situations where the aesthetic is instantly recognizable, even to people who have never seen any of the films.

Ever since the first film, Disney has had this pattern of tentatively supporting it, letting it be greenlit, and then panicking and trying to shove it back in the box the moment it doesn't do Star Wars/MCU numbers. Whether the allegations against him are true or not, Jared Leto was trying to make art. Joachim Rønning was trying to make art, Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross were trying to make art. Disney threw another predictable hissyfit, because the art they produced wasn't something that made them a lot of money. But it's too late, those symbols are already out in the wild.

And what do those symbols represent? For me, William Gibson expressed it the best: Tron is how cyberspace looks in our imaginations. It's how we imagine the look and the aesthetic and the sound of the inner world of the computer networks which dominate our lives and culture, and how we relate to them.

As I've mentioned in a previous post, the question Tron Ares seems to be rephrasing from the first film is, "do we want control of the systems that are being used to create and direct our society and our future to be in the hands of principled idealists, or cynical capitalists?" But in the latest film, this unfortunately translates to "which group of billionaires do we want in control of these systems? If we're lucky, it's the principled ones! If we're lucky, it's the meritocratic Rainbow Coalition with high-minded ideals, not the cynical generational aristocratic (white, English) grifters who just want to make a profit." The problem is, as we are finding out, that it may be cynical aristocrats all the way down.

And I think the answer is the 99% taking control of technology back for ourselves. It's rejecting slop, and fighting for control of our own devices, and the right to repair. I think it's in another William Gibson quote: "The Street finds its own uses for things." Unfortunately, with the enshittification of modern tech and the recent attempts to crack down on Linux happening, The Street may find this to be an uphill battle. But I have faith in The Street. The Street, uh, finds a way.

So, what does something like Tron look like at The Street level, when corporations and billionaires currently own the servers and the means of production, and are making it harder and harder for The Street to interact with those networks without complicity and without participation in capitalism?

The Matrix is an important film series in the cyberpunk canon. But though hacking is used as a framing device, these are not really a "Hacker" films, except in an aesthetic sense. Before The Matrix, hackers looked like Kevin Flynn and Alan Bradley and Lora Baines from the Tron franchise in the cultural consciousness. They looked like the crew from the film Sneakers, or the kids from Hackers. Hippies and social outcasts who wound up in the tech subculture because they did not fit in anywhere else. The most important "Hacker" films of the 1990s, and maybe the last 35 years or so, were Sneakers and Hackers (even though actual hackers rather infamously didn't count the latter when it first came out.) Both of them depict regular folks, or little people on the fringes of society, taking on big corporations or shadowy government agencies and succeeding.

And it's a direction that I wish the Tron franchise would go in, or go back in.

Because the moment Kevin Flynn won, he started to become what he hated.

Maybe it wasn't obvious at first. Maybe he was one of The Principled Billionaires. But within seven years in story canon, he effectively shuffled all the way down the Hippie To Fascist pipeline, via his alter-ego CLU. Everything Kevin Flynn did or learned or achieved was ultimately corrupted by his fascist shadow-self, to the point where not even his own son and surrogate daughter could save him. And the Programs on his Grid suffered for a thousand cycles. And a digital race of people, who possibly would have contributed to the next phase of human evolution, were genocided while he went to his mountain retreat and meditated about it, like Jack Dorsey did irl after explaining via bunch of sad zen platitudes why he wasn't going to ban Nazis from Twitter back in 2021.

Tron: The next day depicts his son as a principled outsider, combating the forces of enshittification and cynicism and control - represented, as per usual, by a Dillinger (here portrayed by Cillian Murphy.)

My fanfic, which I am still definitely working on, presents the remaining Dillingers after Tron Ares as struggling with their fanily Legacy of theft, enhittification, cynicism, and control.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
- I changed my DW theme again. This one is kind of reminiscent of my OG Livejournal theme, but with a background I made myself in GIMP. I need to do some more work on my website.

- The NIN show was great! There was some fuckery because Dallas is gonna Dallas (why do people keep trying to start fights in the pit during Hurt? Apparently this is a common occurance?) But Boys Noize rocked as an opening act, and Trent and Atticus still got it. I have a lot of pictures from the show. All of them were taken from the nosebleed section: and therefore, none of them are awesome. Someone uploaded an entire recording of the concert to youtube.

- Continuing the theme of partying like it's 1996, I went with some friends on a pub crawl through Deep Ellum Saturday night. This may partially account for how I feel this week.

- I am not usually this affected by the time change, but this week it is just hitting me like a ton of bricks. I overslept my alarm this morning, something I have not done in three years or more. I think I might be fighting something off.

- I got my physical and bloodwork done, and I need to start really watching my cholesterol. My platelet level is also elevated, but not enough for it to be a cause for alarm yet. But they also want to monitor that pretty closely over the next few months. At least I'm not anemic right now?

- Barry's Economics is *the* Youtube channel to be following right now. He nails the intersection between wealth and late-stage capitalism with all of the factors which enabled the Epstein Web to hijack every aspect of our culture and society. Your moment of Zen: this video, about the super-richs' disconnect from the rest of the human experience. (Just as I was writing something eerily similar in my Tron Ares fanfic, lol.)

- "Someone is actually reading the room." Firefox just got an AI kill switch. From Tech Radar. Though I'm still bouncing back and forth between Vivaldi and Waterfox. I may go back to Firefox if I can disable AI.

- How Epstein’s biggest financial client shaped millennial teen culture.

- I am offically done distro-hopping I tried CachyOS and it's better. Yes, I'm back on Plasma. It was the siren song of Matrix Code live wallpaper that did it. I guess let's see how long this lasts, LOL.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
So, one of the reasons that I have been obsessively infodumping about the Epstein stuff is that it's intruding into my escapism in a way I can't tune out, and I hate it.

Because this crap has infected every single aspect of the tech world, due to the fact that Jeffrey Epstein, Steve Bannon, and their other cronies roped techbros into their schemes, and used them to help hijack the society we live in and steer it in the direction that they wanted it to go in.

Like, the fanfic for the Tron franchise I am working on right now concerns two rival tech companies. And I can't work on it or even think about it without thinking about the cancer and the rot that is going on currently in real life tech culture.

Like yeah, I can pretend that there isn't anyone like Jeffrey Epstein in the Tron Universe, and that none of that horrible shit happened, and tech in this fictional world evolved along very different lines: and this is obviously the way I *should* actually be handling it. Because there is not an IGE or a Microsoft or a Starlink or Tesla or a META: There's Encom and Dillinger Systems.

But like...the villain of the last movie is a whole techbro, borrowing from a stereotype that is only familiar to us because of how prominent it has become in real life over the past decade or so, thanks mostly to the mechanizations of the worst people.

It's hard for me to write this now without considering everything that has been revealed about the Epstein Web's malign influence over every aspect of the tech world over the past 20 years. Because a lot of the reason we are where we are right now - in regards to AI and "Web 3," is because of them. Just ignoring it feels disingenuous. It feels like whitewashing. Even though: of course technology in the Tron universe progressed along very different lines, because real, actual AI (not the fake bullshit slop we have now) and digitizing actual real-world matter into the computer have existed since 1982 in this timeline. This is science fiction, happening in a world that still feels very much like our own. I mean, the thing I tell newcomers to the Tron franchise is: "imagine if the Technological Singularity happened in 1982, but only a few people were aware of it, or noticed."

BUT, and a youtuber called attention to this aspect of the latest Tron movie without realizing that this is what he was doing: Eve Kim, the character portrayed by Greta Lee in the latest film, is basically Buckaroo Banzai, complete with her own stalwart band of comrades who are the Tron universe's equivalent of Buckaroo Banzai's own Hong Kong Cavaliers. She is a globetrotting hacker gamer biker CEO of a tech company. And while some dorks were of course screaming "Mary Sue!" there is no way as a Buckaroo Banzai fan that I can't just pick this up and run with it, it's perfect.

And THIS is why the Seth Flores character didn't grate on me the way he did on some people in the audience: he's kind of the equivalent of Perfect Tommy and New Jersey at once? And holy shit, the "It's cowboy time" line from the character Ajay Singh: HE'S RAWHIDE. (Or New Jersey?) Holy hell, it's THEM in another universe and incarnation.

And YES this makes the titular Ares the equivalent of Penny Priddy. Just try to get that image out of your mind once it's popped in there. and YES, I know how all of this sounds in light of Jared Leto's involvement in the Tron Ares film, and the allegations against him. (I fucking hate this timeline.)

Anyway my fix for that during the time the film was in theaters was to just imagine what the movie would have been like if the titular Ares had been played by Keanu Reeves instead. (Because of course the Billionaire Techbro would want to make his Supersolider look like John Wick.) That, or Trent Reznor; mainly because of the soundtrack. Some of the fanart I have seen of peoples' fancasting of Trent Reznor as Ares is phenomenal. I have become a fan of the "Young Trent Reznor as Ares" idea since I first saw it, but especially since the remix album of the OST dropped last week, and then I went and saw NIN live in concert.

EDIT:But this all just dovetails back into the reality that the harm of women in children is inextricably woven into the creation media designed to be art, designed to entertain us, due to it being normalized, systemic, and endemic in our culture. Many of the artists whose creations got us through the 2000s and 2010s have turned out to be predators. The only real exception I can think of is the late David Lynch, who was actively trying to alert us that it was going on, through the creation of his own art and media.

And I can't help but wonder what a Tron movie by David Lynch would have been like.

IDK chat, I'm going to have to figure this out. I mean, I'm going to write it regardless. But yeah.

Hell, maybe in this timeline, Livejournal and Myspace are still around. I think it's a lot more fun to imagine a timeline that doesn't involve any of the current horrors, even if it does feel dishonest somehow.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Content warnings for everything awful, obviously.

EDIT: More on the origins of 4chan, and IGE and Steve Bannon's connection to 4Chan, /pol/, and the Epstein Web's influence over the culture wars.

It really does come down to these things: Jeffrey Epstein was angry about being very mildly punished and criticized for victimizing children and women back in 2007-2008. And over the next two decades, he threw all of his money, influence, and connections at the goal of hijacking society and turning it into a place in which his kind of person would be protected and celebrated, instead of held accountable for their crimes. And to do this, he and his cronies (including Steve Bannon) exercised a lot of influence over the late 2000s-early 2010s internet via the Gamergate/"Redpill" movement, and the culture wars that followed. Nearly 20 years later, he has largely succeeded: and all of this led to the election and elevation of Donald Trump.

Gamergate was about Steve Bannon and Jeffrey Epstein harnessing hatred towards women and using it for their own ends, and making girls and women shut up. To make them afraid to speak up about victimization and being mistreated. Qanon was a psyop employed to muddy the waters, and make anyone who talked about conspiracies involving child trafficking sound like a looney conspiracy theorist.

They influenced the rise of crypto to make it easier to launder money, and to be able to conduct transactions in a manner not beholden to the authorities and institutions that govern regular currency - the same authorities and institutions that chastised Jeffrey Epstein in 2007-2008 (and should/could have stopped him cold.) Everything they did was to warp our society into something that would normalize, celebrate, and protect people like them from those of us who would dare try to hold them accountable for their horrific actions.

Even the way the drops are being done is to normalize the acts which were being committed, and to lessen the effect they should be having on people (disgust, horror.) Like they're doing the drops to say "shut up libs, we released the files," but phrasing it and framing it in such a way that people don't realize the horror of what is actually being revealed, get bored, and tune it out. We can't allow this to happen. The literal future of the world depends on whether or not we can finally shut these assholes down for good.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)

[A meme with Doctor Manhattan from the comic book Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons. Doctor Manhattan is on Mars, with the text captions "I am 11 years old. A Republican president is waging war in the Middle East. I am 23 years old. A Republican president is waging war in the Middle East. I am 46 years old. A Republican president is waging war in the Middle East."]

I don't want to be in a state of "I hope all of the stupid jerks who voted for Trump because they believed Kamala Harris was the one who would start another stupid, pointless war are having the day they voted for." Because, as per usual, it's the innocent victims who did absolutely nothing to deserve this who will suffer the most. But that is where I am right now, regardless.

Back in 1999, Neal Stephenson wrote in In The Beginning Was The Command Line that, as of that moment, we as a species were trying to evolve into a global society that agreed not to nuke itself. 27 years later, it very much feels like we have regressed back into a society that is actively trying to nuke itself.

Whatever. I voted for the Prosecutor Lady, because I knew she would *not* do any of the crap that Cheeto Shitler is doing right now. Nine years ago, I voted for the Email Lady for the same reason. Five years ago, I voted for Dark Brandon. 26 years ago, I voted for The Guy Who Supposedly Invented The Internet. And I voted twice for Obama. And so it goes.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
First one:
https://www.tiktok.com/@cypher.j/video/7583448092033273118?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc&web_id=7606948024489133598

Second one:
https://www.tiktok.com/@cypher.j/video/7602464513488637215?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc&web_id=7606948024489133598

EDIT: TL;DR these releases are being done in a way so that they can say they did it, they released the files, without the system collapsing or changing at all. It's giving "we released the files, now shut up and be quiet and go back to work." It's like the files themselves are being released in a way to prevent the necessary societal change which would have prevented Jeffery Epstein, or the next iteration of Jeffery Epstein, from occurring. And people are very much aware and in despair about nothing actually happening, and that's by design, too. So that we give up trying to change society.

([personal profile] nyyki let me know if these crash your screen reader, and I'll link them in another format. EDIT: I had to link them in another format because the embed code from Tiktok is not working. I guess Dreamwidth is too Web 1.0. Just unmute after the video opens.)

It's like that post I made last month. All Conservatives want is power, and continuity of that power. And if the system can have this kind of revelation happen to it and not collapse, that continuity is assured. What was Pam Bondi's wibbly excuse from this week, between her arrogant, childish outbursts? That if the people in the list were prosecuted, the system would collapse.

The system needs to collapse. And for it to collapse, we have to not allow them dispersion. We have to stay mad. Otherwise, the only thing one can do with a system this fucked is leave it.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
Some of my thoughts are echoed by The Liberal Redneck, here.

The whole thing about Jeffrey Epstein having an influence on 4chan and /pol/, here.

TL;DR, this shit goes way past the victimization of children into possible murder and cannibalism, and my capacity to handle those details is very limited. I'm not one of those "true crime" fans who are capable of consuming this kind stuff as "content," or even thinking of it as such. These are details which should have compelled any other society with even a semi-functioning legal apparatus to completely shut down the people committing these kinds of atrocities. The phrase "under the jail" comes to mind. But apparently, we were not even that functional of society back in 2007-2008, when Epstein got off nearly scott-free from the then-ongoing attempts to prosecute his crimes.

We might be living in a very different world today if our legal system had been able to shut him down in 2007-2008, and pull down every single billionaire or hanger-on connected with him. Trump probably wouldn't be president today, for one. And /pol/ would not have been reopened. Our society has arguably been destroyed because we couldn't manage to put one predatory creep away for good eighteen years ago. But if we weren't able to put one predatory creep away, maybe it was doomed to fail, or already failed.

There were so many slippery slope moments in the 2000s that people screamed about, and we were all told to shut up and we were overreacting. This was just one of them. The 2000s just feel like one big slippery slope. And now we've slid into fullblown authoritarian fascism. And it doesn't surprise me at all that it arrived hand-delivered by predator creeps who victimize children.

One sentiment I am seeing a lot in the yotube comments of videos talking about these crimes boils down to, "I don't understand the kind of person who sets out to do these sick, predatory things to people. All I want to do is live my dumb life and work my dumb job and enjoy my dumb little hobbies." And I think that's most of us in the 99%, frankly. Once again, I'm reminded of William Gibson's line about how the extremely wealthy have lost their humanity.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
Here it is.

That was what the Epstein files were really all about. MAGA supported Trump in the first place because they thought he would eventually mandate the persecution and murder of all of the people who disagree with them. MAGA assumed the Epstein List or the Black Book or whatever would be full of prominent Democrat and Liberal names, and ONLY that, and that this would finally give them the justification the needed to be able to execute on sight anyone identifying as Democrat or Liberal or Leftist.

But since Their Guy is Suspect #1, they're now actively against the release of the Epstein files. They've pivoted to just letting the ICEstapo carry on with killing people on a whim. The fact that ICE has not been sent to occupy any border states with higher immigration statistics proves that was never about immigration, any more than it was about "saving children from trafficking" because their guy is trafficker and rapist #1. And now the proof is right there in their faces, and now they can't just rationalize it away.

But it's always been about them just wanting to be able to execute us at will just for disagreeing with them about the economy, disagreeing with them about civil rights (i.e. that everyone should have them), for rejecting their cruelty and hypocrisy, for rejecting their racism, rejecting white supremacy, rejecting their warped misappropriation of a 3000-year-old Levantine storm god, and for gently asking them to put on masks during a global pandemic. That's all it has ever been about. That's what all of their bullshit rationalizations about immigration or "saving the children" are about. Always has been.

Rest in power Renee Good and Alex Peretti, and everyone else victimized by these thugs whose names haven't been revealed or aren't being mentioned right now. You never should have been martyrs. We can't let their murderers get away with this.

Current mood.


[A tweet by c a i t l i n, with the text "Roving banks of masked federal agents with total immunity executing gun owners is the kind of sweaty conservative fantasy we've heard over the last 20 years on cable news and now that it's here, they love it."]
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
This video articulates something that I have been feeling about the Republican party since 9/11 and The War In Iraq/The War On Terror, though I'm sure it was ongoing even before that.

To sum it up, the person who made this video explains that people in the West assume that Putin has an endgame, an actual end he is working towards. But people in Russia understand in a way that people in the West do not that power is the end in and of itself. Endless war and stress and strife serves this agenda in the way that any abuser tries to keep their abuse victims living in a constant fearful present where nothing is certain, no source of information can really be trusted, and the only constant is the power of the oligarchs on top, dominated by the despot above them.

And this has been the Republicans' game since at least the early 2000s. And why those of us who have been feeling this, who have been trying to convince everyone else of this since then feel so jaded and disillusioned now. We told you. We told you where this was headed. We told you that just grabbing and holding onto power was what they wanted, that the age of "business as usual," of "reach across the isle" was done. Oh well.

This is supported by this next article from Medium, by Sprinkled Salt (who is also on Tumblr.) It's time to just admit that MAGA are collectively just a bunch of abusers, and just being nicer to them won't change that or stop that. The only way you stop a bully is by standing up to them, or avoiding them, or leaving them.

Which leads us next to another banger by Catherynne Valente, "This Is Why You Feel That Way: The Incredibly Sad Root of America's Great Malaise." Yes, it's on Substack. Yes, I'm aware that Nazis are on Substack. So is everyone else, apparently. They're going to be there until we get rid of Nazis, in general. I recall a quote by Terry Pratchett about how the best way to deal with a house on fire is by taking the fire out of the house. And yes, this is what we collectively need to be figuring out how to do right now. Unfortunately for us, the best time to have done that was 26 years ago, before it started raging out of control. People have been joking about the "This Is Fine" meme for years, but yeah.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
On youtube, here.

I like how he goes straight into the way that Tron was an expression of 60s Left Wing idealism, and the idea of taking on a corrupt corporate entity: and even going into the spirituality and consciousness-expanding aspects of it.

Spoilers for the Tron franchise. )

This.

Jan. 11th, 2026 10:30 pm
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)

[Tumblr post from Kaiyves-backup which reads, "HE COULD BE IN JAIL RIGHT NOW! We got so close and if the election had gone the other way he absolutely would be and he wouldn't be harming anyone and we would never have to hear of him ever again and every day it tears me up that we were THIS CLOSE to that."]
numb3r_5ev3n: Disapproving Shinji (Disapproving Shinji)
The 5 Calls campaign to stop the military escalation in Venezuela.

I'm pulling my head out of fandomspace and freaking out about my real life!space to address this absolutely unnecessary clusterfuck that absolutely no one asked for except Donald Trump and his pet Ghoulstapo assholes.

I wasn't able to make any of the protests today because of family issues, but I'm sure there will continue to be protests as the fuckery continues, so I'll make it to one eventually.

Cue "I can't believe I still have to protest this shit" shit.

Current Mood.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)

[Image with Caption: A black cat spotted atop the stones at Stonehenge during the Winter Solstice Celebrations. This is considered to be a good omen for the coming year.]

Current Mood.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)

[A Tweet from David Malki which reads, "If a croque madame speaks to another croque madame about something other than a croque monsieur, that's called passing the béchamel test."]
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
My iron has felt low for about two weeks now, and I've gone back to taking a daily multivitamin. It may be time to go see a doctor and see if this is back at the point of needing actual supplements, but last year my job switched me to the shitty insurance (good luck getting in anywhere within a six month timeframe unless it's urgent care or the ER, and I need a referral for Planned Parenthood, LOL.) and it doesn't get switched back until the first of the year. But when it gets to the point where all I think about besides my fanfic is how damn cold I am all the time and how nice it would be to just chow down on an entire bag of steamed broccoli, I know there's a problem.

My dopamine levels are crashing again, and I'm trying to keep the momentum going on my writing. Like I know the process is going through a fuckton of drafts and re-writes, but it sucks having to go through so many drafts and re-writes? It sucks that this is what The Process entails? I mean regardless, the fact that I have written more in the past month than I have over the last decade is pretty important, I think. But I don't want to stop there.

I have voiced my opinion on Christmas and the Holidays on this blog several times by this point. It's a Neurodivergent person's nightmare (or at least THIS Neurodivergent person's nightmare) and the only things I like about the Holidays as an adult are making baked goods and actually hanging out with family and then getting to go to my friends' New Years Eve Party where we play In The Air Tonight to the Ball Drop every year (except for 2020.)


Current Mood.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
I found this, and it's a whole mood:
"your pawpaw didn't run shine through these hollers for you to be a bootlicker."

I fixed up another laptop (my old Thinkpad T420) and installed an ssd drive finally. It's running Parrot Linux right now (a hacker distro, LOL) running on a Debian framework. Arch may be all the rage right now, but Debian and its different "forks" are still the best at what they do, IMHO.

People are doing a "Jobs that you, a neurodivergent person, have had" and mine are basically, from 1998-current:

Tech Support, 1998
Movie Theater 1999-2000
Tech Support 2000-2003
Auto accounts (aka the reason why I will never work for Capital One again, they literally fired me for reading The Onion while it was slow.) 2003
Tech Support 2003-2005
Tech Support 2005-2006
Server Farm 2006-2010
Tech Support 2010-2015
Tech Support 2015-2017
Tech Support: 2017-now.
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
A panel from Alan Moore's Watchmen, with the caption "It's November 10th now."
[A panel from Alan Moore's Watchmen, with the caption "It's November 10th now. There is a circulatory system walking through the kitchen..."]
numb3r_5ev3n: 7 from Matrix Online (Default)
Tron Ares review

[A review of Tron Ares by someone named Kiefer, with four stars. Text: "Kief you called this movie mid in your first review why'd you see it twice" I Cannot Overstate How Much I do Not Control What I Hyperfixate On. Tron has consumed my life and I've warmed up more to this movie as a result."]

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